Thursday, August 14, 2014

The Car Addict + Throwing Tantrums in Public

Pangpa good vibes muna!

Here's a boy who's a certified car addict.

He doesn't want to be away from his cars.

Did you know that whenever we are at the mall or palengke, the first thing he will look for is car? He's getting more and more obsessed with cars and whenever he sees something with wheels he can't stand or sit still. He will do anything just to get closer to that thing . Also, once he picked a certain car you can't do anything to change his mind to replace with another one.

That's one of the reasons why it's difficult for us to tag him along when we go to the mall. He knows where to buy kasi and when he can't get what he wants he will throw tantrums. But just like what I have said, he can not get all he wants and that makes him feel more frustrated. So what to do when a little boy throws tantrum and people around you are looking with judgement?

The first thing I do is try to talk to him, sometimes it works, most of the times is doesn't. That's because when he's so frustrated, he will insist his wants. By that time, Daddy is feeling irritated too so I must stay calm. There's this one time he's insisting we go to Toy Kingdom but I said no, he cried out loud. I try to calm him but he cried more. So I said let's go, and I walked away first. He ran after me while still crying and tried to stop. I gently pulled him to a corner, calmly talked to him and asked him to look into my eyes. I said if he doesn't want to get humiliated in public, then he should act accordingly.

I know kids tend to throw tantrums in public. But I want him to learn how to control his feelings. He must not cry out loud in public. I think he understands what I mean, he stopped crying and hugged me. I don't want him to feel ashamed because I make patol to his tantrums. Shouting on him, or hurting him in public will humiliate not just him but also our self. If I give in naman, for sure he will do it over and over again because he will think that would make him get what he wants.

Just recently, there were parents caught on CCTV beating their kids. It was heartbreaking to watch and you can instantly blame the parents for doing it. Hurting is unreasonable, but we must not forget that we parents are also human. We get tired, stressed, and at one point we can actually hurt our kids. That's because when we are stressed, tired and in pain, we are vulnerable and we can not control our emotions.

We are all different, while some parents have so much patience others always has the tendency to breakdown and yes, hurt their kids. If we always let our kids get into our nerves, yell at them and worst beat them, it will create a great impact to their emotional and mental developments. You may never know, you are already creating a monster out of them. But again, not all parents can understand that and they need help rather than our judgement.

Okay, I have to confess that sometimes, I get my hands on my son too, but never did I beat him. If I resort in hurting him, I know I already reach my patience limit. I know I should have unlimited patience but I am just a human being who can also vulnerable at times. Good thing I have learned to get closer to him so I can listen and understand him. I know for sure he doesn't want to get hurt, he wants attention.

Parents always want the best for our kids so hurting them is always the last thing we want to do. Aside from patience, let our love for them tell us what to do. Get closer and know our kids better. Being stressed and tired should not be an excuse to beat our kids. Remember, we are a great influence to our kids. Oh well, it's really hard to be a parent. We must learn to balance both sides, know what is too enough, stay clam when the going gets tough, and understand and love our kids no matter what. But it's a learning process so don't be ashamed to admit mistakes. Because  like wine, parenting gets better in time :)

Happy Parenting!
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